Motherhood: Month 10

I love this face so much. He’s playing with a troll doll that was mine when I was little 😍. 

Something I wouldn’t have thought of as being a “break” a year ago: mowing the yard. Now I’m like, “it’s been a hard day with this kid, I think I want to mow the yard” 😂. Last week was pretty rough with the separation anxiety. Quinn didn’t want to let me out of his sight or rarely out of his reach. This week seemed to be better in that regard. Separation anxiety is a normal phase of development so I doubt that’s the last I’ll see of it but a short stint is ok with me! It’s nice to be needed but I have no problem with him allowing his dad to care for him as well 😉. I understand why he wants me though: Philip tells the worst dad jokes you’ve ever heard. I can’t blame him for trying to avoid listening to them 😜😜😜. 

Something I never would have (abbreviated would’ve, NOT would of, for anyone who says that, know that you drive me CrAzY 😜) imagined myself saying a year ago: “Your finger tastes like ear wax. Gross.” Or: “Please don’t pull to stand using my underwear” (while I’m peeing🤦🏻‍♀️).  He pulls to stand on everything now. Especially places I would rather he not, like the trash can in the kitchen closet (that I removed the door from years ago 🤦🏻‍♀️) and his diaper pail. I found out why there is a lock on it and the creator is much appreciated. He has recently learned to get back down; before he would get stuck standing places and cry for help 😂. Now he can bend his knees and lower himself. He’s climbing, too.  Up two basement steps today, onto his Adirondack chair outside to try to reach my yoga frog statue, and into the cabinet anytime we get out the air fryer, one of the few that doesn’t have a lock..yet. 

🤦🏻‍♀️

He’s becoming more independent, which is why the separation anxiety stage happens. As he learns he and I aren’t one person, he wants to explore but only until it scares him. He has started walking with a push toy 😩. He really does a great job of occupying himself most days. I can give him a pot, a lid, and a rubber spatula and 15 minutes later he’s still taking the lid on and off, “stirring,” and shaking the pot. He’s doing better with feeding himself although his pincher grasp is still developing. He even tries to feed us 😂. Granted, it’s usually not food. Most recently he insisted on putting a letter sponge from his bath in my mouth and then he also bit it 😂. I got a funny picture of that. He also helps undress by putting his arms up and stepping out of his pants. He doesn’t wash himself but he did wash my face with his wash rag the other day. I’m hoping he didn’t pee in his bath water first 😩😉. 

Our house goes around in a circle. He made the whole loop two days in a row. 

He LOVES to be outside. This is great because I love it, too, however, any time the sliding glass door is open to the deck, out he goes. We have to constantly make sure the gate is closed so he doesn’t fall down the stairs into the yard. The three straight days this past week that it rained were super stressful because he wanted to play outside but it was wet and cold. He threw a tantrum anytime we walked past the door while holding him and didn’t open it 😂. He tantrums by arching his back and crying and then sometimes he’ll come forward with a vengeance and grab your face and try to bite your chin. He’s learning what “no” means as we tell him and hold him at bay so that he can’t bite. He’s already started doing that less. Philip told him not to put a leaf in his mouth the other day and he stopped and gave it to him. He has eaten dirt 4 times with me though, regardless of how many times I’ve told him “no.”  You win some, you lose some 🤷🏻‍♀️. All of that newfound independence means he doesn’t just sit on his blanket in the yard anymore. Well, except for the other day while I was painting his garden shed (which isn’t finished yet but I’m sooo excited to show you all next time 😉) but that was because the neighbor was unwittingly occupying him by weed eating 😂. Quinn watched him for half an hour. He’s a good supervisor 😉. 

I gave him a drink of water to rinse his mouth 😂

He escaped to the deck after his bath 🤦🏻‍♀️  Of course it was empty but he did the same thing that morning and it had sprinkled so he got his pajamas all wet 🙄. That kid is wet 75% of the time. 

Kiki and Mimi (aka Kim and Marsha) got me an awesome first Mother’s Day gift. It was a weeping cherry tree that I planted in the front yard that I can watch grow along with my boy 😃😃😃. I love it! I also got the sweetest gift from my niece, Haleigh. She got me and her matching necklaces that have the I Love You sign in sign language. She remembers that we used to do that with my mom when we would leave her house ❤️. 

Philip got us shirts that say “Our first Mother’s Day” ❤️

He was sleepy and not at all thrilled about standing on his own legs. He’s not a fan of using his own energy when he first wakes up. I wanted to show how tall he is compared to the tree though. 

Ive reached a milestone of 10.5 months exclusively pumping but all of those cold rainy days stuck inside about made me throw in the towel. Quinn was extra fussy and mischievous by day three, constantly pulling the tubes out of my pump, crying because I gated him in his room with me while I was pumping, crawling all over Sansa (who was also gated in) and pulling her jowls and hair and then screaming when I moved him away from her. I didn’t stay properly hydrated so I didn’t produce enough milk and had to supplement with formula one day. It was at nap time and he was overtired and drank it without a complaint. That gave me hope that I could quit if I really wanted to. However, by bedtime we were out of my milk until I pumped so we tried a bottle of formula and he wouldn’t touch it. He actually forcefully spit the bottle out of his mouth 😩. I had to pump to be able to give him his bedtime milk. That meant he was up later while waiting for it but he slept in his crib until 6am, which meant I got a good night’s rest and had a ton of milk the next morning 😂. Side story—I did not have a good night’s rest one other night last week as I woke up at 2 am because I felt something on my face. It was a stupid tick on my eyebrow! If you don’t already know this, I HATE ticks with every fiber of my being. Bugs don’t bother me for the most part but I hate ticks with a passion. I’m not scared of them, I just think they’re disgusting. They’ve been so bad lately (I took 6 off of Soph today!) and both girls are on anti tick and flea medicine so I’m not even sure why I’ve seen so many 🤬🤬🤬. Side story #2—Philip gets my medicine ready for me each night (I’m spoiled, I know 🤪) and he puts it in a little cup. I went to take it the other night and there was a beetle in with it...a large beetle. I still have to take a prenatal vitamin while I’m pumping and they looked pretty similar. He was in the basement so I sent him a pic and said “did you do this?!!!!!!” He said no but wished he had 🙄🙄🙄🙄—-Anyway, I’m glad it all worked out with the milk. For now at least. It’s hard to stay properly hydrated all the time, especially when I’m constantly chasing a baby around making sure he doesn’t eat dirt, or dog food, or random pieces of fuzz from dog toys that are on the floor 🤦🏻‍♀️. 

Non edible items aren’t the only things he tried lately. He had his first Chinese food—Dad’s chicken lo mein— and spaghetti, strawberries, and even fish. He still hates bread and if he wasn’t the only baby boy born at Reynolds during our hospital stay, I might think he was switched at birth. Oh yeah, he looks a tiny bit like us, too, I guess 🤷🏻‍♀️. Maybe he’ll come around. 

He might’ve  gotten a couple bites actually in his mouth 🤷🏻‍♀️

Philip made him his own baby cheeseburger 😂. He threw it on the floor 🤦🏻‍♀️  

He loves his strawberries and cottage cheese! 

Quinn had a couple other new experiences in the last two weeks also: his first bike ride and his first swim. Philip’s mom got us a bike trailer for Christmas and we finally got to use it the other day. We weren’t sure how he was going to do with it but he was super chill and just ate his pickle I put in his mesh feeder so he couldn’t choke on it. I tell you what, that boy loves pickles; a redeeming quality for his bread hating 😂. Kiki got him a pool and he played in it yesterday on the deck. We thought he would enjoy splashing and playing in it since he loves the bathtub so much but he just kept crawling in and out, and doing it not the least bit gracefully 🤦🏻‍♀️. I moved his little slide outside and while it isn’t high enough to go over the edge of the pool, I turned it backwards and thought he could climb up the slide and step into the pool. He didn’t even try. Apparently sliding over the rim and landing face first was more fun 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️. 

That’s his “safety flag” sticking up. While I agree that a safety flag is a good idea, Schwinn made sure to say in the instructions HOW IMPORTANT it is to use...but instead of putting something like, ya know, caution 🤷🏻‍♀️, on it, they put their damn brand name 🙄. 

Chillin’ and eatin his pickle. 

We’ve been spending so much more time on the deck because Philip and I finally constructed the gazebo I bought for it a couple of months ago. This was a replacement one because the last one got destroyed in a wind storm early last summer. Without it there is no shade past noon. We are thoroughly enjoying having one again. I even got in the hot tub for the first time in over a year. I wish I would’ve taken pics of the instructions that came with that gazebo. If someone gets paid to do that job, I need to be that person. I will be 100% better at it, guaranteed. They were terrible. But speaking of new jobs, I am the new Wetzel County Farmers Market Manager. It’s only a few hours a week so it didn’t replace my current job. Come see me every Thursday 4:30-6:30 and support your local farmers! 😉

The girls are also enjoying us being on the deck more because that means the door is open more which means more bugs get in 🤦🏻‍♀️. Sansa loves a good fly chase. Or bee chase, which I’m afraid won’t end well 😳. She got stung the summer right after we got her and her face swelled up and she just kept pacing back and forth. I had to go to Walmart at like 10pm to get her some Benadryl. Now I keep it on hand. 

Good thing there wasn’t any water in it. She got in while chasing a bee 🤦🏻‍♀️  

Sansa is such a good big sister 💙 💜 

Sophie actually tried to sit on Quinn 5 seconds before I took this pic. I guess she’s accepted him as one of us now 🤷🏻‍♀️😂. 

She hides under the table all the time now. This used to be her spot just when she got scared. Now we’re pretty sure she’s hiding from Quinn 😂😂😂. 

His room was a disaster but they don’t mind. 

I was trying to change the bed clothes 🤦🏻‍♀️  

Stay safe, everyone!

Motherhood: Month 9.5

Quinn turned 10 months old today! Today, the day to celebrate being a mother, my first one. For the last 10 years this has been my least favorite holiday and is probably the same for most who have lost their mothers. While I feel great sadness every year remembering the beautiful, strong, smart woman my mother was and feel the hole in my heart that never fully mends, this year is a little different thanks to Quinn. I love being his mother. Having him gives me a reason to celebrate. I also celebrate because I have the greatest support system of friends you could ask for who help shape me into the mother I am and want to be. I’m so grateful to all of you who love my baby. I’m also extremely grateful for my husband. I couldn’t be the mother I am without him. He supports me in every way and is the best father to Quinn. He recently graduated with his Bachelor’s degree and I’m so proud of him. It took longer than a traditional student but working full time and going to school requires a huge commitment and he stuck it out until the end. Now we will have more time together as a family on the weekends when he won’t have schoolwork to do!

Our baby is growing way too fast. I recently put away his bassinet and bath tub. He’s been going to sleep in his crib in his room each night but still waking at some point and coming to our bed, but we’re working on it. Putting him to sleep sometimes still includes a Bedtime Battle Royale, especially now that he’s eating so much more food; I think it makes him gassy. He wants me to hold him but he squirms all over me. Once I trap him and work his legs a bit and give him some gas drops, he usually calms down enough to sleep. Even though he wakes and comes to our bed, he is no longer getting up to eat during the night so waking up just long enough to relocate him is so much nicer than a 45 min to an hour feeding/pump session! He would probably sleep all night in his crib if he didn’t think he is a free range baby who can roll endlessly in whatever direction he chooses. I’ve watched him on the baby monitor get stuck against the rails of his crib and be pissed and crying because he can’t move 😂🤦🏻‍♀️. 

Bedtime Battle Royale. I won but it sure doesn’t look like it 🤦🏻‍♀️😂. 

I got him some anti-slip animal stickers for the tub so he’s able to sit in the regular tub now. Well, sit may not be the correct word to describe our bath times 🙄😉. In general, he’s all over the place nowadays and bath time is no different. He’s constantly trying to drink the water, pull to stand on the side of the tub, grab a shampoo bottle or two, etc. I also got him alphabet and number sponges to play with in the tub and each night we choose three letters for him and we go back and forth telling him words that start with each one. By the time bath time rolls around my brain is usually fried and the word lists last for about 10 exchanges, maybe. For some reason, the other night, we were on a roll with the letter P and 2 hours later Quinn was sleeping and we were still going 😂. I have no idea why we both have such an extensive vocabulary of P words 🤷🏻‍♀️. 

They make me happy, too 😊.

I had to install the cabinet latches in the bathroom and kitchen last week, a task that was on my eventual to-do list but got bumped up out of necessity 🙄. While I was putting in my contacts one morning he opened the cabinet door. I was standing right by it and I THOUGHT the only thing in his line of sight was going to be a big cup that I use to rinse the tub so I let him continue. It didn’t take more than a second to realize that’s not what he got out. As soon as I got my contact into my eye and off my finger I saw that he had pulled out the liquid hand soap refill that didn’t have the lid screwed on securely and it had covered a nice size spot on the floor 🤬😩. I was reminded in that moment of a time about 7 years ago when I was watching my brother’s kids while he and Lori went away for the weekend for their anniversary. Kate was only 1 and into everything. I was cooking dinner and turned my back to her for literally like 30 seconds, enough time for her to find a bottle of sunscreen and proceed to squeeze it alllllllll over the floor 🤦🏻‍♀️. Fun times 🤪. Anyway, cabinet latches became priority number one that day so that I could shower without a second incident. He is not happy about the cabinet latches, especially the ones in the kitchen. He enjoyed tearing out the pots and pans and now the doors only open about 2-3 inches. I wouldn’t care so much about those except he throws the iron skillet around like Thor throws his hammer. I’m afraid he’s gonna smash his foot. 

His absolute favorite thing to get into in the kitchen is the dog water dish. I swear, if he sees it on the floor, he makes a beeline straight for it! We constantly have to put it up or outside when the girls are out. He loves water—drinking it (from a straw! 😃😃😃), splashing it all over the floor, sticking his hands and face into the running faucet. However, he also loves their food bowls, too. Because Philip works at home, he’s in the basement all day and can sometimes hear what’s going on upstairs. The other day he heard Quinn crying and my laughing hysterically and he texted me, “Why are you laughing at the crying baby?” 😂😂 I replied, “because he’s crying because I just took a piece of dog food out of his mouth,” and a minute later, “his breath smells like dog food 😂😂😂.” Ugh, he wears me out. 

Quinn-1, Mom-0

Helping Mama garden. He played in the dirt for 45 minutes!

Once the bink came out, dirt went in 🤭. 

For round 2, Mom remembered to bring snacks so eating dirt wasn’t necessary 😂. 

I cleared a space for his garden shed that’s coming soon! I’m so excited 😃

Mama’s big boy ❤️. 

He is really into EVERYTHING. He discovered my bookshelves and likes to pull books out. I had a map of NYC on one of them and he was looking at it one day. The day that I found out he can now rip paper 🤦🏻‍♀️. Yay for fine motor skills! 🤪. He and Sophie conspired because he would rip a piece and she would eat it 🙄😂. He really is building his fine motor skills and can remove all 7 pieces from a chunky puzzle. Taking things apart is a busy pastime of his. He also enjoys tug-o-war, we learned today. Philip played with him using some bandanas tied together to make a long “rope” and he laughed about it forever. Baby giggles are the best. 

Even though he traps me in the bathroom by pushing the door open too far, which opens toward the toilet, and rubs his messy face on my clothes, constantly leaving me with random food splotches all the time, I’m trying to cherish every moment because before I knew it he’ll be a sassy 2 year old and then a fit throwing threenager. Time is going by so quickly and I just want to enjoy everything about his babyhood. In a way I’m grateful for this quarantine because I’ve gotten to be home with him and witnessed so much of his growth. It’s amazing ❤️. 

However, I miss shopping. Like, a lot. I can shop online but it’s not the same as in person shopping. I like the thrill of the hunt. You never know what you might find (and on sale😉). I’ve spent so much time at home that when I do leave I’m like “Do I even remember how to drive?” lol. I think about how much I like my Jeep every time I drive it now. I guess having a break from it made me appreciate it again. Lots of things in life are like that. 

I realize that not everyone is fortunate enough to be able to enjoy this break from society. My uncle recently had a heart attack and needed surgery. His family wasn’t able to be at the hospital with him because of the virus. I can’t imagine how scared they all were to be away from each in such a stressful time! My friend’s dad had to have surgery also and she wasn’t able to be with him. In both cases things ended well, thankfully, but can you imagine if they had been different? It’s important to remember that you can spread this virus without knowing and the consequences may be fatal. Someone could die, without their family. I don’t want that on my conscience. Please stay safe for yourself and everyone around you, even people you may not know!

The girls are still the same: Soph with her never ending need for attention and Sansa, the saint. 

Laying on the obstacle course that I made for Quinn to crawl over 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️.

Always has to know what’s going on lol


Lol I love this pic of her 

He loves her. She wishes he would learn to pet without pulling hair lol.