Creative Kimpire: October 2022

This picture makes me laugh 😆.

Do you ever wonder how your kid grows when they go days only eating two bites of cheese and taking a sniff of dinner? Maybe that’s just my kid 🤷🏻‍♀️. I never wanted to turn eating into a battle but Quinn will give dinner a side eye 😒 , say he’s full, and then ask if he can have ice cream 🙄. In an ideal world, we wouldn’t have junk in the house and there would be no pre-requisite that requires him to eat “real food” first. I suppose that’s the only way I could achieve my fantasy of not making an issue out of food. I didn’t ever want it to be a good food/bad food or a junk food reward type situation, but if allowed to choose, Quinn would subsist solely off of Reese cups and cereal.

Mornings are particularly rough. Quinn wakes up hungry, but, for whatever reason, declines any food, after asking me repeatedly what he can have. The issue is that I’m not giving him the answers he wants. That’s an annoying strategy he tries to use—asking the same question over and over again, trying to get a different answer. I was frustrated starting every day in this manner, so I tried to think of a solution. He loves to pretend to cook and play with food in his kitchen, so playing off of that, I created a breakfast menu for him to order from. I printed out pictures of breakfast choices and velcroed them to a laminated sheet so that I could add or remove options, according to what we have available. Now when he asks me what he can have, I tell him to go look at his menu. He likes “ordering” his breakfast, and I like when he eats so he doesn’t turn into a hangry beast.

Full menu

When we don’t have something, I just remove that picture and store it backwards in the clear pouch.

Another technique I discovered by accident that worked to get him to eat was buying snacks to keep in my car, and telling him he couldn’t eat them at home. Apparently, snacks that are meant to be saved for later taste better than snacks that are already in the cabinet. Who knew? I keep a bag in my car filled with snacks so that we always have something while we’re out. The day I bought some to refill it, Quinn decided to eat about 18 beef sticks and 13 bags of Cheez Its. Obviously, I’m embellishing a bit, but he really did eat entirely too many beef sticks. I told him if he didn’t stop he was going to have a belly ache, but he informed me that he wanted to have a belly ache so there’s that.

We’re into candy season, which isn’t making our already challenging eating situation any easier 🙄. We haven’t even had a city Trick or Treat yet and I’m already over the daily candy battle. We’ve been to three events already where Quinn has gotten candy—Boo at the Zoo, Trick or Treat at the plaza where my brother works, and Boo at Bruce. In the plaza, most of the stores there had employees who were giving out candy, however, Quinn was most excited to see a gigantic dog. It was way bigger than him. They said it was a Great Dane, but it’s bulkiness made me wonder if it wasn’t also part mastiff. I’ve never seen a Dane that meaty. Quinn met a Great Dane at the market this summer whose name is Walter. Walter sure left a lasting impression because he is now the standard for how big dogs are, and others are often compared to him. He’ll see any other dog out somewhere, point it out to me, and then remind me that, “Walter is huge!” 😂

Boo at the Zoo:

Porcupine, zebra, ostrich, cheetah, emus

Eagle, owl, crane, leaf covered turtle

Tortoise, wolf, palla’s cat, snow leopard

A new dinosaur exhibit! It had a big bouncy thing, but we didn’t do it.

Cheesy teeth! 😁

Have you ever seen a giant snake yawn? 😳

Boo at Bruce:

Our crew-Link, Ash, Quinn, and Kate. Kate was cold so she stole a blanket out of our stroller 😉. The park was packed! They had over 400 kids attend this event!

Quinn was a hit through the shelter. Lots of people commented on how he was just chillin in the stroller, legs crossed, eating chips and drinking juice. His candy bag was open beside himn

so people were just stashing goodies in it, and he didn’t have to do any work 🤪. Ash was tired so I had to get out his carrier and wear him. He fell asleep as soon as he got home and slept all night 😅. I guess all of the excitement wore him out.

Quinn likes to dress up at home just about every day but refused to wear a costume to the zoo, plaza, the park, or the Chili Fest, which had a costume parade three weekends ago. He tells me he’s going to dress up for Halloween, but we’ll see I guess. I bought Asher a costume but I should have gone up a size because getting him in it is like trying to stuff the biscuits back in the can after it has popped 😬.

There are so many festivals and celebrations in the Fall and it has just been a fun season for outings so far. This is the first year that we’ve really done ✨all of the things✨ because of covid, but Quinn being older makes things more fun, too. Well, usually. When he’s not whining 🙄.

The Center for Children and Families hosted a Roll and Read last weekend. They had stations set up along a walking trail and different organizations provided crafts or objects that correlated to parts of the book “There Was An Old Lady Who Swallowed A Ghost.” Mimi was the old lady and Kiki came with us and brought her grandson, Luka.

We got to see a fire truck and learn about fire safety at the library last week! Quinn was impressed with the tire being the same size as him 😆.

Ash got to hang out with his friend, Luka, again at a birthday party. Quinn was being Quinn and didn’t want to go 🙄.

He got to see Fern, his adopted great grandma, too 😊.

We went to my nephew, Lincoln’s, skating party for his birthday today. Quinn wouldn’t skate but Philip and I had fun trying out quad skates. We’ve both had roller blades forever, and I’ve used the other kind before but Philip hadn’t. I forgot how much harder they were to use! We took Asher’s stroller and were allowed to push it out on the floor. We took turns pushing it, using it like old people use carts at Walmart—for stability 🤪. I didn’t get any good pics. They turn out blurry when you’re skating 😅.

I’m constantly second guessing myself and my parenting style because how I want to be and how I am, aren’t always in harmony with each other. I’m interested in respectful parenting (treating your child like a human instead of an inferior being) and don’t like fear based parenting so much. That doesn’t mean he can just do whatever he wants, it just means that he can have feelings and I will try my best to help him work through them, instead of telling him to stop crying 🙄. I want to be a safe space where he can always come to for support and problem solving and not be afraid. There will still be consequences, but they will be reasonable.

It’s extremely difficult to help him through big feelings when he’s committed to being cranky. But sometimes I feel as though I have unrealistic expectations of him. It’s hard not to take things personally, but he doesn’t even have the capacity to think of me when he’s having big feelings. Yes, he’s using a mean tone to me, but it isn’t about me, really. It’s about his frustration and how he’s learning to communicate it. Finding the root of the problem is essential to switching the narrative. So, I try to be understanding and patient but sometimes it feels impossible. Like, when he has just hit his brother and then throws himself on the floor, crying, because I said he couldn’t have a cookie when he asked 2 seconds later. How can I validate feelings when I’m struggling with my own? Ugh.

I’ve become a yeller. This is unexpected because I’ve calmed down considerably over the last decade and a half; probably from living with the most frustratingly calm person alive 🤪. However, I didn’t also use to live with someone who pushes my buttons All. Day. Long. I swear, no one (well, no mature adults anyway), can antagonize you like your own kids. I’ve never had an adult sing nonsense at the top of their lungs while riding in my car. Or jump on my couch, repeatedly, after being asked not to. I’ve also never had one draw a huge circle on my area rug with a marker. Speaking of which, while making Quinn help me clean it off, he proudly stated, “I did a really good job on that circle” 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️. This stage of development is all about reigning in the impulse control and boy is it a struggle!

If those were the only things he did, I could maybe keep my frustrations in check, but Quinn spends his days annoying me like it’s his job. He parks his bike at the bottom of the porch steps, making it cumbersome to get through while carrying a baby in a car seat. He washes his hands at the bathroom sink and then throws the hand towel in the hamper after drying his hands, every single time. I’ve told him to just leave it on the sink and I will hang it up, but every time it is in the hamper 😡. If he notices that I’ve gone down to the basement, he goes and shuts the door behind me. If I’m going into the basement, there’s a really good chance I’ll be bringing a laundry basket back upstairs with me, so I hate having to try to open the door while holding it. When he’s ready to lay down for nap, Ash is typically already asleep. I go with him, but he always lays down first, making me have to lay between the two. Quinn has started putting his arm under my back as I’m laying down. I guess he thinks it’s funny. He loves to tell me if I go back on something I said to him. Just this week, I got frustrated with him at nap time. Like usual, I had already gotten Ash down for his nap before I went to tell Quinn it was time to lay down. Quinn got into bed and immediately started talking to Asher. I told him to be quiet, that Asher was sleeping. He wouldn’t stop and even tried touching him. I scooped him up and told him he was going to nap in his own bed. As I was carrying him out, he started crying, saying he wanted to stay. I told him he could, but he wasn’t allowed to say anything else or he was leaving. He laid down and kept quiet. A little while later, I told him, “I love you, Quinn.” He said, “I love you, Mom. But you said I can’t say anything else.” I told him he was right, that’s all he was allowed to say. He stayed quiet and fell asleep 😂.

That’s about the only time he has been conscious and quiet in the last 732 hours. Well, aside from the evening I made him a really thick smoothie 😂. That kept his mouth busy for a while. He was back to saying, “Shit,” for awhile, just to see if he could. I will tell you honestly that when he becomes old enough to understand how to use cuss words, and when not to use them, I won’t care if he does. Now isn’t that time, though, so I had to get him to stop. I got a lot of “Why can you say it and I can’t say it?,” questions. He would sometimes forget and start to say it with a “shiiiiii..,” and I would give him a look. He would then say, “I didn’t say shit,” which was, obviously, necessary 🙄.

Quinn likes to control the conversation, telling me what I need to ask him 🤦🏻‍♀️. He was saying, “Tell me why XYZ,” when he really wanted you to ask about it. I think he has it figured out now and usually says, “Ask me,” instead. He’ll say, for example, “Ask me why firefighters have ladders on their on trucks.” When I do, he’ll respond, “That’s a good question. Because they use it to rescue people.” The first time he told me, “That’s a good question,” I literally laughed out loud 😂.

Another thing that made me LOL that he said was about his bink (that he no longer has). He randomly talks about it sometimes, I would guess because Asher’s bink reminds him. The other day he told me, “Why don’t I have my bink no more? For one, because I wasn’t listening, and for two, because I’m too big for them.” He remembers everything. That situation wasn’t one that I was especially proud of, when I took his bink. So it’s unfortunate that it stuck with him so well when I didn’t get it exactly right 😞.

We have a couple of “blue park” (school playground) running jokes. There’s an episode of Blippi where Blippi is looking for pumpkins in a park and he tells the kids to shout out, “Pumpkin!,” if they see one. He finds one and ask the kids, jokingly, if they said, “Peacock,” instead. Peacock is now the word we say when we find something, but also whenever we first see the playground. As soon as we reach the parking lot, Quinn always yells, “I see it! Peacock!” 😂.

To get to the playground, we always walk, so we use the cross walk at the highway. I don’t know if it’s the cadence of the automated sign or what, but I couldn’t figure out what it said when the walk sign was lit. As we were crossing one day last week, Philip mimicked the sign and said, “Walk sign is on.” I said, “Ohhhh, that makes way more sense than what I thought it said.” He asked what I thought it said and I told him, “Walk dar da dar.” 😂😂😂. I’m aware that the likelihood of that being what it said is zero, but I could not figure it out. Anyway, we all got a good laugh out of that and then the next day, Quinn randomly brought it up again, remembering what I thought it said and what it actually says. Now he says at least once a day, “Mom, you thought the sign said, ‘Walk dar da dar,’ but it really says, ‘Walk sign is on,’” and then laughs.

Quinn listens about as closely as me, apparently. We’ve had two incidents recently where he needed to put on his listening ears. One was funny; one was frustrating.

The funny:

Philip: *pretending to be surprised by Quinn sneaking up on him* “Oh boogers!”

Q: *laughing hysterically* “Mom, did you hear what he said?!”

M: “I heard him.”

Q: “He said, ‘Holy snot!’”

M: *Laughing hysterically* “No, he didn’t!”

Q: “What did he say?”

M: “Oh boogers.”

Q: “Hahahahaahahahaha! Oh boogers!”

And the frustrating:

Me: *repeating myself for the 4th time*

Q: “What?”

M: “I’m not saying it again.”

Q: “You’re being a heck. I’m not talking to you anymore.”

M: “I’m being a what?”

Q: “You’re being a heck. I’m not talking to you anymore.”

M: “I’m being a heck?”

Q: “Yes. I’m not talking to you anymore.”

M: “What’s that mean?”

Q: “I’m not talking to you anymore! You’re being a heck!”

M: “Okay.”

*10 seconds later*

Q: “Mom, what was that noise? Was it just the floor creaking?”

He is scared of random noises now. He discovered a new channel on YouTube, where a family pretends to look for different make believe characters—pond monsters, ghosts, pig man, and his favorite, Big Foot. Any time he sees some foliage, he says, “That seems like a good place for Big Foot to be.” We were walking down by the river a few days ago and I had my camera. I told Quinn to run out of the trees like Big Foot was chasing him (because he wouldn’t stop talking about him), and I would take his picture. I showed Philip the picture and he asked if I was going to put Big Foot in it. With his guidance, I photoshopped Big Foot in there. When I showed Quinn, he just kept asking me if Big Foot was really there and if he was going to get him. I told him it was just pretend and showed him the real picture and the one I used to put him in the final one. I got it printed for him to have and he hung it on his kitchen play set.

😂😂😂

Quinn is such a homebody, he always complains when we have to go somewhere, except for the blue park. He was being particularly difficult one day that we were planning to go, and I ended up telling him we weren’t going, after he pushed Asher over (Ash is sitting up by himself now but Q thinks it’s super funny when he falls, so he sometimes helps that happen 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️). The bad thing about not allowing your kids to go somewhere is it’s then a punishment for the parents, too, because then you have to listen to the whining and continue to fight the battle of misbehavior. At least at the park he would’ve knocked his shit off for a little while 😂.

I had propped Ash up in the corner of the couch to play with toys while I went to get my coffee. Quinn yelled for me and said he fell over. I found them like this 🥰😆.

On a rare occurrence last week, Quinn actually wanted to go somewhere and asked, “Where are we going after nap? I’ve been stuck in this house all week!” It was Tuesday. And we had literally just gotten home from the library an hour before 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️.

I had to get new struts on my Jeep. I told Quinn we were going to have to drop it off at the shop to get it fixed the next morning. He took his toolbox outside and worked his magic, letting me know he fixed it in a matter of minutes. He later asked me at bedtime what we were going to do the next day and I reminded him about dropping my car off in the morning. He told me in an exasperated voice, “But I already fixed it!” I told him they were just going to check to make sure he did a good job 😂. I sure wish he had fixed it, his rate for everything is five dollars and that’s a hell of a lot less than what I actually paid!

Asher will be 8 months old on Tuesday. It’s so hard to believe. He has mastered sitting up unsupported, is working on waving, giving kisses, and sprouting his two front top teeth. Although he can’t technically connect it to me, he says, “Mama,” so I win and that’s all that matters 😝😝😝. Quinn said, “Dada,” first so Ash evened the score.

He screams like a banshee 75% of the times I change his clothes or strap him into his car seat. He turns into an octopus anytime I try to nurse him, making it difficult to do anywhere except in bed. He pretty much exclusively nurses now; I only pump about once a week, usually just if we’re planning to go somewhere because it’s not really feasible to lay down to nurse him anywhere outside of our house 🤪. It does make life easier to not have to pump, but it also leaves me extremely touched out by the end of the day. I feel bad when Quinn wants to sit on me or have me pick him up because I really do not want to. We cuddle at nap and bed time though, so he’s not completely left out.

The first year really, truly does go by so quickly. When you’re in the thick of round 2, you remember all of things you took for granted when your first little got bigger. You forgot how hard it was to do anyway while carrying around the extra appendage that is your baby. Like eating dinner, being in the vicinity of any hot object, using scissors, having long hair 😒. Those grabby hands are everywhere. It makes me appreciate all of the people who are so kind and helpful when we’re out and about—the strangers who hold doors, or bring our our pizza to our car, or offer to get us napkins at restaurants. Also, the friends who offer to hold him so that my arms can have a break (I’m especially thinking of you, Miss Tella 😊. You make Story Hour much easier for me!)

I had to tuck in Ash’s hand on our walk because he wouldn’t stop grabbing Quinn’s face 😆. If he can reach it, he will grab it.

And now for our Pupdate:

We discovered when we went to the zoo that Sophie sometimes channels her inner kangaroo…

😉

She had some playtime on the activity mat the other day. Asher didn’t mind sharing 🤪.

She got to visit with her BFF, Bear, when he came over to visit 😍.

Some of our activities this month:

We made more pumpkin volcanoes. Volcanoes never get old around here 🌋.

Once we finished with those, I got out the canning jars for some color mixing. It’s a good thing we now have a working dishwasher and I didn’t have to clean 16 jars 😬.

We explored dancing colors by using the magnet wand to lift color chips along the side of the glass pitcher, and then watched them fall back to the bottom. Quinn has no idea how that blue mark got on his forehead and how his hand turned blue 🙄.

Quinn discovered what I drew with a white crayon by painting over it with watercolors.

This one was a 🕸 spider web.

And this one was a pumpkin 🎃.

We practiced balancing by building apple trees with popsicle sticks, toilet paper tubes, and pom pom balls.

Quinn went on a leaf hunt, finding the foam leaves that I hid around the yard.

Ash helped, too 😉.

We played with the Fall sensory bin again, me ordering and Quinn delivering. I put a different spin on it this time and asked him to sort the items and line them up so that we could talk about which ones we had the most of. Enjoy this hot mess of a picture, this is what his room looks like 85% of the time 🤪.

I made another sensory bin from dried black beans and random objects from the Dollar Tree. I made that dog from a Pringles can like 2 years ago. Quinn still occasionally pulls it out to play with it so I used the bones from it to add to our theme.

Philip got creative and wrapped Quinn up like a mummy using crepe paper 😂.

We attempted to make a Halloween village and I think this picture accurately depicts how that went 🙄🤦🏻‍♀️.

We made a salt painting by tracing leaves with glue (me), sprinkling salt on them (both), and dropping colored water on the salt with a paintbrush (Q).

Finished 🍁 🍂

We built a fire and roasted marshmallows 😉.

We practiced following a recipe to make a pretend apple pie with oats, pom pom balls, the cinnamon shaker (cotton balls with just a dash of cinnamon for smell) I made a while back for his kitchen, and felt for the pie crust.