We’ve only been in our new house for two months now, but it feels like we’ve always lived here. It’s an unexpected feeling considering we lived in our previous one for almost 18 years. Philip and I expected the feelings of newness to last for much longer, but we’re happy everyone has settled in so easily.
We are all in agreement that our front porch is one of the best, if not the best features. The swing that Kim gifted us is loved by all. We spend lots of time outside because of it. The side yard is small but efficient. We’ve had water play, foam soap exploration, and yard yoga, to name a few! The thing I was most worried about was trading our large outdoor space for a much smaller one, but there was no need. Having great neighbors has more than made up for it! The boys love the immediate neighbor kids, and so do I! My niece, Kate, and nephew, Lincoln, and their friends have all spent time at our house, too. I love being the house where everyone hangs out. I hope that continues as our kids grow.
Where better to play with all of the superhero figurines than the porch?
We really hit the jackpot with neighbors!
All of the kids are older than Quinn and Ash, but they seem to get along anyway. Ash just acts like he’s one of the big kids and jumps right in with whatever they’re all doing. I would estimate that fifty-five percent of the time, our two get along and play well when it’s just the two of them. Sometimes I feel guilty that I haven’t spent the same amount of time with Ash doing activities like I did with Quinn. I can say that the investment I made with Quinn has paid off two fold though, because Ash is much more advanced than Quinn was at his same age, and honestly, Quinn is the one responsible. He doesn’t intentionally try to teach Ash most of the time, except for shit I don’t want him to ð, but Ash just absorbs everything Quinn does. He can count to ten, knows all colors, and his full name, and makes connections that surprise us. He followed me to the basement to do laundry the other day, and while we were down there, Philip walked out of his office. Ash told him, “Horse ride,” but Philip said he couldn’t give him one (put him on his shoulders) because the ceiling was too low. Ash was quick with a solution and told him, “Upstairs.” ð. He memorizes our every day routines, and knows what’s coming next. He rides in the stroller for the majority of our evening walks, but he always asks to get out before the designated spot where we allow him to. We do this because he would never make the entire distance. When we tell him, “Not yet,” he’ll say, “Lincoln’s house,” because he knows that’s where he’s allowed to get out. It’s like asking before we get there has become part of the routine, too ð.
They love stopping by Lincoln’s (my brother’s) house almost every day. Quinn isn’t that interested in seeing the new baby, Oliver, but he tells me all of the time that we have to save toys or his clothes for when Oliver gets bigger. Ash loves seeing him though. I was holding him the other night and Ash wanted me to bend down so he could look at him. He reached his hand out to touch his hair and said, “Pet him.” ðĪĢ. That’s nicer than what he wanted to do a few days later. When we were down their house to visit, Ash wanted to hold Oliver, and kept saying, “I want him.” I asked what he wanted to do with him and he answered, “Put him in trash.” ðĪĶðŧ♀️ðĪĶðŧ♀️ðĪĶðŧ♀️.
Quinn: “Dad, take a picture of us!” ð
ðĨđðĨ°
I think he learned that lovely sentiment from his brother. Quinn says the most random shit sometimes. He’ll come up to me and say, “Mom, did you just say, you’re going to eat a whole pot of soup, punch me in the face, and then throw me in the garbage can?” Nope, never in my life have I said those words together.
I was taking Quinn to class one day and he noticed several blue houses during the drive. He said he liked blue houses because blue is his favorite color. I asked if he knew our house is blue and the following conversation ensued:
Q: “What the heck?!”
Me: *I laughed and repeated him, but he didn’t quite hear me*
Q:“Did you say what the h…..?”
M: “I said what the heck.”
Q: “But you can say what the hell and shit.”
M: “Yes, I can say those words.”
Q: “Why did I just say them?”
M: ð “I don’t know, Quinn.”
Q: “Oh.”
M: “Don’t say them at school.”
Q: “Why?”
M: “You’ll get in trouble.”
I’m not sure where Quinn picked up name calling, but he has chosen an interesting name for Ash. For some reason, he refers to him as “Grandpa.” ðĪ·ðŧ♀️ðĪĶðŧ♀️. He’ll be like, “Mom, where’s Grandpa?” That’s a much nicer nickname than he’s given me, which is Stinky Old Lady ððð.
He’s been on a kick calling everyone, “Butthole,” so I asked him one day if he even knew what butthole meant. As suspected, he didn’t. He told me, “I don’t know, a hole with a bunch of butts in it?” ðĪĶðŧ♀️. A few days later he was saying, “Butt crack,” repeatedly, and then asked me, “What’s a butt crack anyway? Is your butt even crackable?” This kid.
Ash has picked up saying, “I hate you,” from Quinn ð. Quinn gets really upset when he says it to him, but I told him the best reaction is to either ignore it or to say, “I love you,” because that gets Ash to flip his script. It works every time.
Quinn got in trouble the other day during bath time, and when I made him get out of the tub to go to time out, he told me he hated me. After his time was done and I went to talk to him about it, he said, “Mom, I tried so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so hard not to say it!” I appreciated his effort, anyway ð.
He threw a huge tantrum last week, the biggest one he has had in a long time. He screamed for 25 minutes in his room, thrashing about, making a mess. I had gone in at one point and asked if he was ready to talk about whatever was causing it, but he just screamed more. When he finally calmed down, he told me, “Even when I was screaming so, so hard I still loved you.” I told him, “I always love you, no matter what.”
His most frustrating behaviors right now are arguing about shit he has zero knowledge about, and doing whatever it is I just told Ash to stop doing. I guess an almost five year old brain thinks it’s logical to see if the action is forbidden for him, too, even if he knows it is. And it’s almost always something he knows—throwing something, standing on something (apparently dogs and children have a similar thought process regarding things laying on the floor ð), touching something, etc. Sometimes it’s so hard not to degrade him by telling him to use his brain, but I’m not sure he’s always capable of forethought. Regardless, we try to instill that line of thinking. We’ve had many, many conversations about how his actions affect the outcome of consequences and he showed me the other day that some of them may finally be sinking in. Whenever he has been misbehaving, I always try to get to the root of the problem, which often times is because he wants attention. I’ve talked to him about how he needs to voice his needs and wants, because misbehaving will not produce his desired effect. He actually said to me one day, “I’m misbehaving because I want you to play with me, but you’re never going to say, ‘Quinn, you’re being so mean, I want to play with you!’” His self awareness rivals some adults, that’s for sure.
Too bad that rationale is a one off, and it completely eludes him when he’s arguing for the sake of arguing. That kid will tell you the dumbest thing and then defend it forever. He’ll even throw my own retort back to me, saying, “You can think that but you’ll be wrong.” When I finally tell him I’ve had enough, and he needs to stop or he’ll go to his room, he loves to tell me that his dad is older than me, as if that holds some sort of weight. I tried to stop letting that annoy me, but apparently I’m four years old, too, and couldn’t let it go. I told Philip how much that was triggering me and we hatched a plan to just tell him that we’re both the same age, taking away his perceived power over me. I don’t even know why he thinks his dad would disagree with my decision anyway, we’re pretty always united on that front ð.
He may not have the power to overrule me with his dad’s authority, but we do remind him that he can control how his day goes. If he chooses to follow the rules, and be kind to his brother, his day will be much more enjoyable than if he chooses the opposite. He made bad choices a few weeks ago, which lead to him losing his ninja costume, his most prized possession. That evening we were planning to attend the Taylor Swift block party being held downtown, an event that many of our friends were also attending. He told me he didn’t want to go if he couldn’t wear a costume, and if I made him go, he wouldn’t be nice to his friends because they’re allowed to wear costumes and he isn’t. Of course, they don’t care about having the privilege of being allowed to wear costumes, so that didn’t matter at all. I told him that was no reason to be mad at his friends, it wasn’t their fault his costumes got taken away. It was his fault, and his fault alone. He made bad choices, and now he had to deal with the consequences of those choices. I refuse to allow him to grow up being the kid who never takes responsibility for his own actions.
Another thing he’s going to be taking accountability for is cleaning the toilet if he doesn’t start flushing it. Stagnant pee ranks pretty high on my list of smells I hate. I think I must have an unusually strong sense of smell because I am bothered more than most by unpleasant smells. He keeps freaking out when I remind him what he’s going to have to do, and runs and flushes it, claiming it had already been done ð.
They haven’t cleaned the toilet yet, but they did learn how to do dishes ð. I don’t really like for anyone else to load the dishwasher or wash my dishes, but I’ll relent for the sake of learning a life skill ð.
I mean it when I say I’ll make him clean it. I made Ash clean my MIL’s window when he slobbered cheese puffs all over it. They have to learn somehow ðĪ·ðŧ♀️.
Learning boundaries is hard. Ash got mad at me one day because he wanted a Hug drink like Harper had and I wouldn’t let him go over to her house to get one. He told me, “I not play with you! Ever again!” Take a guess where he learned that sentiment ð.
Big brother gets a little bit of payback with Ash’s lack of boundaries regarding Quinn’s stuff. He thinks everything is his for the taking. Quinn could take off a dirty shirt, and Ash will decide he wants to wear it ðĪĶðŧ♀️ðĨī. I won’t let him wear anything that’s super gross, but for the most part, I don’t fight the clothes battle. Ash is in the choose-his-own-clothes phase, so he often does not match. It pains me when he chooses a Christmas pajama top and camo shorts, but I resist the urge to make him change. It’s a struggle ð .
Ash is a poorly dressed instigator ðŊ. He gets Quinn going for absolutely no reason other than he wants to. Quinn was telling some long drawn out story, so of course I don’t remember what it was about except for the fact that he said something was metal. Ash instantly chimed in, “No it’s not!” I guarantee he had no idea what Quinn was talking about either. He disagrees with Quinn, and then they go back and forth about nonsense ð. Quinn has even picked up the word instigator from overhearing Philip and me talking. He told Ash he was one the other day, to which Ash retorted, “No I not!”
He’s going to miss Quinn when he goes to Pre-K in the fall. They’re each others’ primary playmate, so it will be interesting to see how Asher’s personality blooms with more time on his own. When we dropped Quinn off at the Little Red Schoolhouse last week, Ash and I had a conversation.
Ash: “Quinn.”
Me: “Quinn’s at school.”
A: “No, I want him!”
M: “I know. We’ll pick him up in a little bit.”
A: “Want to play with him.”
M: “I know.”
A: “Want to pet him. In the face.” ðĪĢ
When we picked up Quinn a few hours later, the first thing Ash said to him was, “Hi, Buttface.” ðð.
He may indeed be a buttface, but he’s one heck of a good big brother sometimes, too. Ash wanted to change his shorts a few weeks ago, while I was busy doing something. Quinn volunteered to help him. Ash was a little leery when Quinn made him lay down, since I typically do it while he’s standing. Quinn got the job done though! Ash has since learned how to change his shorts himself, but he still asks Quinn for help taking off his shirt if I’m not around ðĨ°.
I’ve tried so hard to keep track of all the things we do, and memories made, but there have been so many lately. The days are so long, which is sometimes good, and sometimes really not. Overall, life is good ð.
We got to see an example of what sprouts from an acorn. This was a great full circle lesson because we’ve collected acorns in the fall, so it was cool to see what happens with them in the spring. I pulled multiple oak tree starts out of our landscaping. This was the first time I had ever seen the acorn attached like that.
I started some sunflower ðŧ seeds in my indoor greenhouse, and they didn’t quite kick the shells off yet. I think it’s neat to see the process.
Hard rains make big mud puddles, which attract frogs, who are in their mating season. There were 16 in one area, croaking and having an orgy ðĨī.
Quinn is now terrified to dig in the dirt because he kept finding worms ð. I’ve explained that worms are harmless, but he can’t be convinced. Ash found it interesting, but he still wouldn’t touch it.
Beautiful peonies bloomed in our new yard, and I was ecstatic to see them ðĪĐ.
My cherry blossom tree is finally fruiting! It sure has come a long way!
It grew as fast as my babies! I planted it in 2020, a gift from Kim and Marsha for my first Mother’s Day ðĐ·. Lessons Mama supplied:
Ashy practiced sorting by colors and then by shapes, using the materials given to Quinn at his Pre-K visit.
Quinn found hidden letters using a Magnatile, an activity my friend Holly spotted for me on Pinterest. I was skeptical it would work, but the red did! The other colors did not.
We made some magic bubbles and homemade blowers with straw pieces.
The bubbles went bigger scale with our foam table and totes ðŦ§.
Harper dunked her hair, so Ash was determined he was going to do it, too.
He loves playing in water ðĶ ☀️.
My collection of marbles in the water table was a hit, along with scoops I saved from all sorts of foods.
Another day, the sensory table got filled with tapioca pearls. I’m pretty sure Harper was the only one who liked it ð. They were soooo messy. They’re basically edible water beads, a much safer options for littles (and not so littles—ahem, the almost 5 year old ð) who still put things in their mouths. They take a LOT longer to cook than any Pinterest recipe I saw, but maybe I got different ones than them.
Empty honey, ketchup, and lotion squirt bottles make great water toys!
Everyone who comes to our house ends up a victim of the water table ðŽ.
Yard Yoga is one of our (mostly mine ðĪŠ) new favorite pastimes.
Ash loves to invade other people’s spaces ðĪĶðŧ♀️.
Sometimes we make impromptu slime, just because Harper mentioned it ð. I found a really good recipe for it, so I wanted to take supplies to Nathan and Carly’s house to make it with their kids, too. Unfortunately, the Dollar Tree was out of liquid glue and I had already been to Walmart, so I wasn’t going back.
I got them all Silly String instead, but I didn’t realize how quickly they would use it up so it amounted to like 5 minutes of fun ðĨī.
We had a great time at the creek with friends—Micah, Carlowe, Benaiah, Azzy, Kenny, and Lincoln, and moms, Megan, Tella, and Bethany. Getting 8 boys together could have been disastrous, but everyone was well behaved! Of course, Quinn chose to wear his ninja outfit ððððĪĶðŧ♀️ðĪĶðŧ♀️ðĪĶðŧ♀️. I took his swim trunks because I knew he would eventually conform, and he did. As soon as he was finished with the water, back on it went ðĪĶðŧ♀️.
Quinn attended his first school friend birthday party for his friend, Eliza. I discovered that her grandparents used to be our neighbors when I was growing up.
Taylor Swift block party! Harper and her friend made bracelets for it, so they made the Woody one for Ash ðĨ°.
We went hiking with our neighbor friends! The kids had a great time going with them. This was our second time on the 4H trail, and the second time we saw a snake ðĐ. Harper almost stepped on it!
We took another trip to the zoo, just to get out of the house. We shot over to Cold Stone Creamery for some amazing ice cream before heading home. It turned out to be a pretty good day ð.
We got to watch Link at his soccer game. He’s a beast on that field! He’ll be amazing as he gets older.
We got to watch this gorgeous girl do her thing at a rare home track meet ð♀️.
Banana slices covered in vanilla yogurt and topped with sprinkles and then frozen.
I tried making us slushies with the crushed ice option on fridge ice maker but it didn’t work very well. Next time I’ll try the blender.
Sophie PUPdate ðū:
She’s definitely comfortable in our new house. She’s even started taking over spaces that aren’t hers ð. Like, the bench in my office space,
The blanket the children were using for their pizza picnic,
The porch swing,
And the other porch furniture,
Although, she typically likes being under it, rather than on it, because she’s a Scaredy Dog.
The Fed Ex guy came on the porch for a delivery one day and she growled at him from her hiding place, but wasn’t brave enough to come out and do it ð .
She makes a great porch decoration though ð .
